Pelicans are R4pists and C4nnibals

Okay, I just couldn't let this one go: mental_floss has just reported that recently ornitholigists have noticed more and more pelicans flying confusedly into suburban areas, away from their natural habitats. Some of their symptoms like burnt feet are consistent with poisoning from a sea algae, but a study estimates almost 80%  of pelicans are exhibiting these symptoms, while saltwater tests don't show the high toxin levels necessary for such a wide impact. Why?

Because pelicans are r4pists and c4nnibals. They are just getting what they deserve.
Wait, what?
That's right, scientists have been studying pelican behavior and call it Forced Copulation (FC). Basically the pelican be4ts and r4pes unfledging chicks once they are separated from their family pods. And often times they will completely devour other birds living in close quarters with them.
Don't believe me? Read the full story on mental_floss blog, or watch this video of a cannibal pelican mercilessly devouring a poor, unsuspecting pidgeon.

These sick birds are just getting what's coming to them.
[edit 1/13/09] Due to Google serving up ads about r4pe, I have replaced 4's for a's so the ads are more valid.

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